Sure, it's been a bad few years for anyone named "Karen." You've taken quite a hit for being everyone's racist, whining, complaining, entitled, worst-case-example-of-humankind ever. It must be hard introducing yourselves and being immediately compared to THAT Karen.

 

Buck up and get over yourselves! You're not the only ones suffering from "Name Appropriation." And some of us have been bearing our scarlet letters for much longer than you.

 

Think about it. How would you like to be "Average Joe" or "Plain Jane?" Never extraordinary, as bland as a saltine cracker, never at the top of anyone's game; just plain, old, average!

 

Who gets invited to the coolest parties? "Chatty Cathy," that's who! And who doesn't get invited? "Debbie Downer." She hasn't been invited to a party since she and "Gloomy Gus" accidentally attended the same party and altered the space/time continuum.

 

Was it "Negative Nancy" who got a first draft of Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone and said "No one will read a story about a boy wizard"? Of course it was!

 

I could go on and on. "Lazy Susan." "Nervous Nellie." Being "Handy Andy" used to be a good thing; He could fix your furnace and unplug your toilet. You were happy to have him around! But after #MeToo, his name has taken on a whole new meaning. No one wants that kind of "renaissance."

 

Who knows how long these names will last? No one does! It could be generations. It could be millennia. Just ask "Doubting Thomas." Jesus, it could take forever!

 

 So I suggest you sit back, relax, and enjoy the ride. Like the rest of us.

 

Bye, Felicia.

 

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